Real Life

One of my best friends emailed me the other day. 

Her words were biting. 

It wasn't that she said anything rude or mean. Rather, she wrote about how my life looks so perfect on Facebook and how God has richly blessed my family. We now live almost 500 miles apart, so we mainly keep up on Facebook and via email. She doesn't see the every day life of Kari Whaley. The Lord used her words to convict me. 

Am I being fake?

If people think my life is perfect (or even remotely close), then the answer is YES.

I emailed my friend back immediately. The last thing I wanted was for her to think it's all sunshine and roses around here. What good does that do anybody? I'm not looking to make anyone envious, and I'm certainly not trying to display a fabricated view of what my life is like.

So, let me tell you, the Whaley family covets your prayers.

We're in difficult times right now. I'm not referring in any way to COVID-19. I'm talking TEENAGERS. And TWO YEAR-OLDS. And FINANCES.

One of us is struggling with a bad temper. One of us is struggling with temptation. One of us is struggling with lying. One of us is struggling with a desire to be the center of attention. One of us is struggling with a loss of close friendships. One of us is struggling with guilt. One of us is struggling with the feeling of failure. And, if I'm completely honest, it's utter chaos around here the majority of the time.

I would be disloyal if I went into great detail, but take my word for it, this life is hard.

After I responded to my friend with the truth, her response was, "I guess I just figured that having a pastor as a father that they would just all behave perfectly." No, friends. NO. If anything, Satan has his sights directly set on this humble, two-story home.

Last night was a tough night. One child's struggle with sin was once again brought to light and it felt like our world was crumbling around us. Tears were shed and I felt like my hope for this next generation was completely consumed. 

Listen, friends. I still wouldn't change a thing. My Lord blessed me greatly with these children and with my amazing husband. I trust His wisdom and I trust that He has a purpose in all things. I have an unwavering HOPE because of Him. I know that my Father goes before me and knows each day before I live it. He has orchestrated every moment of my life--including the suffering and the temptation. 

All this is to say, please don't look at my Facebook page (or anyone else's) and think we've got it all together. It's just not true. The truth is that I spend many nights crying myself to sleep because of my children. I spend many nights awake at 2 am because fear for their future nearly devours me. In all honesty, I lie awake many nights because I'm broken by my own sin and shortcomings.

So when you see my next casual post regarding my children or my family, pray for us. Lift us up to the One who sees and knows our every blemish and our every wound.

Kari